First off, 'Hello Harry,' he will never be able to not be Harry Potter. And 'Wicked,' goodness I would love to see this. And so would my friend Cherie who went with me, and she is going to see a show with her hubby for her 30th Birthday. I think I may just have to be a tour guide, or promise them dinner or something and convince them that spending the money on 'Wicked,' is just a fabulous idea...who needs to feed the kids for 2 weeks anyway?
I tell you what. I know that there are people that read this blog that live in New York City, ( Holla!), but I feel as though everyday would be an event in NYC. From what to wear to what to eat, from where to eat, to where to go. From how to get there, to when to get there. It's constant movement, constant things to stare at, constant trend changing. I seriously would not be able to keep up. We would head out with our stroller daily and get lost in things to stare at, not making it home until after 8 p.m., looking a bit flustered, starry eyed, and exhausted. A constant caffeine buzz and ability to achieve one if you are lacking every single block. I am a people watcher. Some people are bird watchers, safari watcher, tv watchers, I am a people watcher. I am amused by people's ways, nuances, and things that make them tick, and just how they tick. To make you really uncomfortable, you can pretty much be rest assured that before I have talked to you, I have sized you up. And not in a snotty pants kind of way, making sure that you are good enough to associate with me, that would be just ridiculous because I am by no means that mean girl who doesn't let you sit with her at the lunch table.And seriously 9 times out of 10 we have something in common, I promise you. I am sizing you up to see really if you would be receptive to even talking to me, if you have the moment, and or if you need the moment. And that is just the way I tick. I like to silently observe people, how they interact. So New York City sends my weird character trait into overdrive.
So we get there (we is: Me, my lovely neighbor and friend Sue, my darling friend and super knitter, Cherie, and my fabulous friend Bonnie who is my son's BFF's mother), we find the parking, we begin to walk, a light mist in the air, because it would never be 70 degrees and sunny with a light breeze when I plan to go somewhere. I think that happened once. It was on Ethan's 2nd Birthday and it was a trip to the zoo at the end of March and all that we needed were light jackets. That NEVER happened again.
So we stand in line, and we wait. See when you sign up for the Rachael Ray show she has a list of things when you are chosen to be a recipient of her tickets that you are required to follow. And one of those things is that even though you were chosen to be in a selected audience, you are not guaranteed a placement in the audience. I know. Seriously, four people behind us, they stop the tickets. No joke. And these people were given the same confirmation that we have. You also have a dress code. Which I tell you really isn't followed or adhered to all that much by the staff. I mean, I wouldn't go in there in your sweat pants and Bon Jovi tee from his tour in 1994, but this girl in the front row was wearing wellies, and I am not quite sure why, I mean it was misting, but why on earth would you want to walk the streets of New York City in rain boots? The puddles seriously are not all that deep honey, and there ain't no grass to be frolicking through.
So as you wait in line you do the typical 'standing in line chit chat,' with others. What shows have you been to, when are we going to be let in, what did you get at other shoe tapings, what is Rachael like? And there is a lot of speculation as to what she is like. There is a mixed review. Some people say that she is not very friendly. That she does the show and is pretty impersonal. I say that everyone is entitled to their bad days. I mean ok, she is in show business, and there is no business like show business, but day in and day out? You are bound to have a bad moment, bound to get in a fight with your hubby, have pms, have to fart and no one will leave you alone, the dog crap on the floor and you step in it. I will be the judge, we will see, you know me the people watcher.
And she was cute. She was hungover from a night out with Bobby Flay because you know she's super important like that and has famous chefs invite her over for dinner. She wore her leggings, boots, a blazer, and a tank, and she looks just like she does on t.v. She was joking and she was engaging, but she also had a job to do. She has to remember how to prepare every single meal she prepares people and side bits of information about meat, veggies, seasoning, I mean I can't blame her if her mind is in another place. She ad libs, although lines are prepared for her, and she knows exactly where to look, when to look, and how to look. I don't know how people can go through stuff like that and not make a million mistakes. She did not fumble over her words once. I would be,'...and like, stir this, and then like, add some of this, and then like, pour in some of this, what is this called again...oh yes, broth.' And that is why Rachael Ray is the host of her own television show, and not me.
We sat in auditorium style seats that were on a large circle floor that rotated to all the different sets. The guests were Katie Lee and Elizabeth Berkley. Katie Lee made some fish tacos, talked about her new book, her new line of Stila Cosmetics, and surfed on this surfboard that was attached to an inflatable ocean, like a giant moon bounce. It resembled the bull that you get on in hole in the wall bars, and for whatever reason, people feel compelled to sit upon to just be thrown off in such a manner that something in the back is bound to be thrown out. However, back to Katie Lee, most importantly we all got her make up that she was promoting by Stila. Not too shabby, I enjoy the color of the blush.
Bonnie, in the taxi, and for some reason feeling compelled to apply her new make up that Katie Lee gave her.
Yet,I just couldn't help thinking the entire time that she was talking that she had been married to Billy Joel, and sorry Bill, but he is like super old, and she is like my age, in fact a few years younger, and you know what married people do, and it just kind of baffled my mind. She is a super cute southern girl with some great legs, and she can cook, what in the world is she doing with a man that is most likely older than her father? But I heard nothing she said because here I am thinking, 'well she didn't really need the money, and well he does sing really well, and I mean he is uberly famous, but look at her, she could have married any singer. I wonder if she felt weird around his daughter because technically they are separated by as many years as siblings are. And, I have never had a fish taco, I wonder if they taste good, they certainly smell good. She is just wearing khakis and a tank, that's weird, she is going to be on tv, nationally. I wonder why they ended their marriage.' Seriously, I need a life.
And Elizabeth Berkley talked about her book that she wrote surrounding giving advice to teenage girls. I don't know. I don't think I would want Jesse Spano from the Saved by the Bell and the girl who starred in 'Showgirls,' giving my daughter advice. That's all. I mean Jesse Spano really made some bad decisions. She actually told Rachael that Showgirls was meant to be funny. Like, mocking showgirls in general. Like the movie, 'Best in Show,' or 'Napoleon Dynamite,' or I don't know, 'Anchor Man.' I don't think so Jesse Spano.
Then Rachael made some other dish. I forget what it was, but a crucial question was answered for me at the completion of the meal. No. The audience does not get any. So totally unfair. It's a cooking show. I think that Rachael could take a slight decrease in her salary in order to let her guest taste some samples. Oprah gives away samples if she is talkin food or drink. I'm just sayin. You want the following, you have got to give up the pasta. But in actuality, they have a list of the staff and go down it, and if your name is up, you get to take all the food home from that show. I mean I guess the staff is cool enough. The warm up comedian was entertaining and all. I don't know, I just think that comedians in general have this weird personality that leaves them with the inability to turn off the joking and sarcasm, and in reality at some point you are like, 'ok shut up.' We got out just in time.
Overall, it was better then 'The View', but I haven't been there since Whoppi took over, so that isn't really fair. I also went to Regis and Kelly, and the dynamics are a bit different because it was live. And they are very real, and very engaging with the crowd. Since I will never be able to see Oprah, I will be a bit sad, I can only imagine that unless you are in the audience when they are talking about slaughter houses, it might be a good show to see. Could you imagine? 'Oh what was she taping, you are so lucky to have gotten tickets to Oprah.' And you can only reply, 'Oh we got to see a video of Lisa Ling in a slaughter house telling us all about dinner...moo...' I hope they got a free ipad or something.
My favorite part of the day, was literally the drive. My friend Bonnie, you know Tinkerbell? Yeah. More on that in a bit...let's just say that for one she states that the movie 'Titanic,' changed her life. Lordy, I love her.
So New York City. It's a bit of a concrete jungle in every sense of the word. If you suffer from claustrophobia, this is not the place for you to visit. If loud noises and people scare you, stay away. But for me, there is something about it. I think that pre child, if I could do it again I might want to live there for a year. Not that there is anything wrong with raising your child in New York City. Just to me, living in the city and having a baby would prove to be way too much for me, another odd quirk that would produce overload. However, I highly suggest it as a day away with your lady friends like mine, if you know, you can get there and back in a day. If not, maybe a weekend? Just remember to bring me with you and don't honk.