Pinterest Anonymous

Cracks me up every time. I need it framed.

I'm not sure about you.
However, I am pretty certain I should probably enter Pinterest Anonymous.
Hi. My name is Melissa, and I am a Pinterestaholic.

My story begins a few years ago when you needed to request an invite to be allowed to join Pinterest. It was a secret society. I remember waiting for this invite anxiously. No kidding. I was anxiously waiting to get my invite to a website. What's that? Did you call me a loser? Oh but I assure you, you have no idea the realms of Pinterest and what it will bestow upon you by clicking around this site of mass distraction. My friend got her invite before me, I was super pissed. It's like getting looked over for the cool kids sorority and all I wanted to do was wear a toga. Now a days anyone can join this website, and although it took some of the novelty away, you can bet your sweet bippy it did has not deterred me.

I presently reference Pinterest like I reference WebMD when I have a sharp pain in my head. Recently I self diagnosed myself with either a tumor or an aneurysm. So I better start planning my funeral with Pinterest, cause if it is the latter, it could happen at any moment. I want a distressed looking turquoise casket and painted mason jars to hold the flowers, as well wreaths make from cupcake liners. No poster board picture displays, you need to handcraft frames out of pallets. And we need to come up with some good favors. Start pinning.

Morbid. But totally serious. Funerals can also be crafty and creative. I will be searching your board to see if you qualify to help plan.

While having these random sharp head pains,  I need to make cupcakes for  the Kindergarten Valentines Day Party. Now come on, I cannot go buy a box of mix and some icing at Target. I am over the top. I was all over Pinterest the other night looking for the exact Valentine Cupcake for this year which the children will devour in less then a minute flat. Presentation people. Let's not forget it. My cupcake will have no less then fifty ingredients and look like something cupid himself created.This is in Party Planning 101. I torture myself, and if you are a master pinner you do too. You stand amidst the bomb that went off in your kitchen knowing that you could have just ordered 32 cupcakes from a bakery, put them on a plate, and called them your own, but what does that do for our egos? That's right. Not a thing. The greatest glory will come when your cupcake itself is sitting on the 'Popular Pin' Board.

You know if you are a devoted pinner it becomes a little bit of a healthy competition Who am I kidding, this is not healthy at all, it's borderline obsessive and this is why I am now needing to enter a rehab for this addiction. But I am pretty certain there will be a waiting list, and we will be pinning  and sharing while waiting. 'Oh did you see this Christmas Tree for your mantel with leaves made of felt!?!?' 

It's all about these awesome ideas, but its also a bit of who can find and come up with the greatest most original pins. It's a show of who you are. Kind of like facebook but with material objects. You know when people post pictures of just their feet on the sand with the ocean in the background? 'Yeah you think your thing you found to do with modge podge is awesome? Well look at this end table made of recycled barn wood with old book pages adhered to it. BAM!'

You pin a pin, which leads you to another person's boards. You know it for certain that sometimes when you click into a person's board you get a little disappointed, like the click was a little useless for they are no way up to par with those you pin with. It's true, don't even try it. Her recipes are definitely not something you would cook and her quotes are just plain unmotivational.

 The pinning society that you have created usually includes your friends and family. And also people you specifically follow because their pins just plain rank up there with your interests, humor, so on and so forth.

My parents pin. My mom will not join facebook, she holds to the opinion that it's too trendy and will take up too much of her time. Yet, she vicariously looks over the shoulders of those who have a facebook page and will comment. She however has joined pinterest because apparently this is different. And that it is, but I'll tell you mama has an awful lot of gardening ideas that didn't take just a few minutes to pin. Just sayin.

My dad is an avid pinner. According to his boards he is going to Hawaii, making old tools with new tools, working out with lions, and building a bio dome. I do laugh sometimes at my dad's pins, but not because they are just laughable. It's mostly because some of the ideas are so outrageous, totally him, and I know that in that moment, he is sitting there on his computer thinking about how he can make a certain pin come into fruition. No joke. And I can't wait to see my mom's face.

From Mike's Boards. I might actually swing on a swing again.

Occasionally while pinning I will seriously been in a nice and quiet room, kids in bed, and be laughing out loud at a certain pin. Again, go ahead, call me a loser, but some of these can seriously change a mood into a smile or at least a snort of a laugh. E cards especially crack me up, and also provide you with some really good comebacks if you need one. Not encouraging tit for tat, but sometimes even just saying them in your head or to your BFF works.These laughs are reassurance again that I am not the only person who thinks or goes through these things.

Sorry Ma...but it's funny.

There have also been pins that I would love to pin, but don't because I am pretty certain I would offend people and also get a lecture from my mother. Cause you know when you are 35 lectures from your mother are still really cool. What's that? Yes I did sneak out of the house at night with my friends when I was 17. And I have also read the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy!! Horrors, which I call enlightenment. Wait for it...lecture on how this is not funny will be given this week.

My favorite thing to do is to search for one thing you are looking for...let's say a cupcake recipe since this is what I am after, and quickly you have found that you have accumulated and pinned over 20 recipes and are now laughing at cat pictures. What???  And one recipe would have been sufficient, but you never know, and you need to stock up. Or when planning a birthday party for your 8 year old. Once you pick a theme, it now has its own board with no fewer then 60 pins of ideas for this party. And then you are somehow then looking at new nail color shades and designs.

Now that you have pinned the party ideas and having it, you are now going to be up until 3 a.m. making pom poms to hang from the ceiling every night for a week leading up to the party. All because of Pinterest. It's no longer Martha...it's now bigger. Exhausted, fingers bleeding.

 Pinterest, I believe, feeds into everyone's secret hoarding tendencies. But its all  there on a website, not crawling up the walls of your home, so it can't be that bad. But damn those cupcakes look good, and that's right, I punched and strung each paper circle to make that garland above your head.


What I look like while making my big Pinterest ideas.

But it's organized chaos if you really do it right. It's you naming specific boards for specific pins. It is not only hoarding, it is OCD at it's finest. Naming your boards and picking it's cover photo can really be a challenge. I mean sure, you can just label them, 'Food', or 'Clothes,' or 'Furniture', or 'People at Walmart Pictures.' Or you can get fancy, and this is the challenge. Simple and Thematic.Listen, I readily admit it and confess. Pinterest is no closet in my bedroom. This is some important crap right here.

Pinning is like shopping without the cash. It is dreaming without the commitment. It is laughing without having to worry if people are thinking you are overly crass. But then you read this blog and find out my secrets. It is having a stylist without being a millionaire. It's remodeling your home with some pretty sweet ideas. It is creating ideas with good intentions. It's...

Planning a vacation.

Paris? On the bucket list. Who's isn't it on?

 Tybee Island, Georgia. Must be in a beach cottage. I also pinned ideas for my own flipped beach shack, but one ought to visit the place first and acquire some massive fundage. Minor.

 Bora Bora. And this is where I never come home. Ever.

Inspiration, Advice, & Ideas from Friends.
 ...cause friends can send you pins and vice versa. What What. Some of them are great laughs, some of them are really good reminders, or slaps in the face to wake up, or something great to make with yarn
...you know, whatever your fancy.

This blog  ( <---- click that word homies, we are moving up here with the links) It was shared with me, but what is better is the instagram feed #theoandbeau, which you can connect to through her sidebar instagram button. Adorable.

Confirmation and Motivation .
... for yourself or perhaps some others that you desire to take such advice. 

Innovative Ideas. Gift Ideas. 

 Taco Tuesday just got better.

 The girls with love this. Christmas List...check!

 This is a deodorizing patch to squash the smell of passing gas. I don't know about you, but I just found my go to birthday presents for this year.

Announcement Ideas

 Man alive I wish I had thought of this.

Party Planning.

Making old things new again. How To's.

 No need to thank me.

Ways to warm your junk.

 What? It's been cold this winter. Bundle up.

Links to a really awesome video by my fave late night host.(again...click here,dad)

Or links to my new favorite song. Go ahead, turn it up and dance.

So go ahead and join up. I can promise you hours and hours of clicking or tapping on things you never knew existed. And on second thought...I won't be giving up and joining 'PA' anytime soon. Happy Weekend People, see you on the boards.

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