This is the universal sign that you have a potty trained little girl on your hands, because she now knows she has gotta go, doesn't really want to go at the particular moment, but knows not to go in her pants.
If you are a girl or own a girl, you know this pose. My day is filled with catching Kendall in this position. Personally, I love that it is instinctual. Because, if you are a girl, you know you've done it...lots of times. I never once taught Kendall that this is how we hold the pee. Of course I tell her when she yells, 'I have to go pee pee,' and there is no potty we can get to within 3 seconds, 'Hold it,' because that is just what you say, implying hold it in, this position is just what comes from having to hold it in.
I am not quite sure why it is thought that this might keep the pee pee in. Let me tell you it doesn't work like a cork on a bottle of wine. Kendall has been running across the lawn in this exact position and the pee has worked its way around and out. I suppose it is the idea that it might just hold it in.
I can remember standing in lines at grocery stores pleading to my mom in this exact position with the added wiggle, (me not my Mom), that I had to go pee. But would have to wait until all things were paid for, loaded in the car, and then we would go back in, if I was lucky. Otherwise I would have to 'hold it,' until I got home. I say my Mom is the lucky one, many a times I just made it. As a result, I can hold my pee like a grand master champion, but also, I now have major sympathy for my little pee-er. When we are in a store and she says, 'I gotta go,' we go. No messing around. Cart is left, and we run, hands assuming the position.
The funny part is, is that Kendall will, 'hold it,' legs crossing over one another, and I will ask, "Kendall do you have to go potty,' and will get a 'No thank you Mommy.' Then she will cross legs, do a little jig one more time, release hands and assume activity, 5 minutes later, 'Kendall do you have to go pee pee?' And all the potty trained girls that she plays with do it, there is no shame in 'holding it,' and doing the pee pee dance. Could you imagine if we as adults still did this, 'held it,' amongst our lady peers until the conversation was done and no one thought we were mental? I think it would be hilarious.
You say, take her anyway. I say, she is in control now. She pees in her pants after I asked her, she is inside. She is potty trained, she knows her limits. And I am telling you, much to our surprise, she makes it to the potty, on her terms, I guess. My strong-willed child. Pick your battles. Good Times.
Sometimes I ask her when she says no and we are not in front of peers, 'well then why are you holding yourself?' Here are some of the creative responses, which have nothing to do with having to go pee-pee, as she holds the expression, duh Mommy, that I have gotten.
- because I have an itch
- because I have a wedgie (perk of being a girl)
- because it feels like something is in there. (Oh, so just checking)
- because I didn't know if I had panties on
- ( My favorite, this was yesterday's) I was looking for my pocket
of my pants. (well it ain't there sister)
I suppose her peers will one day tell her that this isn't a cool thing to do, until then, do what you got to do, just don't go in those pants!
This will hopefull be my last post on Kendall potty training, what an adventure. After a break, I am on to the little man. For some reason, I think this one might be a little worse. Stay Tuned.